Being a minder, the easy job?

Being a minder, it's an attractive job for girls, oh yes! "playing with the kids", "laughing with them", "stay with them all day", "easy, easy", "I love them", "they are cute" and so on. These are some of the thoughts that most girls have when they get excited to do this new adventure. Suddenly, other thoughts and situations come up into Au pairs mind during this journey. Being an Au pair or Minder is the most common job for foreign girls that want to travel and get experience in different countries. They receive an attractive offer of the job, such as free accommodation, free food, learn the language with the family and, of course, meet the adorable children. However, this "easy job" get difficult because most of the girls become the parents of the children. At the first stage, children are adorable, however, they are so demanding, they need attention and care. Minding the young people become a nightmare for parents, it could be due to their exhausted job or routine and also it gets tricky when parents want to have a little freedom or space, at least for reading the newspaper or having a cup of tea. Minders would be always the saviors and heroes for parents. Hence, some of them take advantage of the goodwill of the girls. Once they can deliver the control and trust on the person who is going to look after their children, they could forget the responsibility on their infants. Overall, parents demand on the minders many hours of work, children activities and as if it wasn't enough the house duties. Nevertheless, I will not say that all the families are like that. In my own experience, I would say that being a baby minder hasn't been difficult because it has depended on factors that I would like to share six simple steps to you:

1) We are not parents, we are Minders.

As Au pair, we need to understand that we can not take parents position in the infant's life. Children always will ask for their parents, even though, the minder spend the major period of time with them. I have heard many experiences from few friends of mine, and the principal issue is that minder is not respected by the family. They receive unmotivated comments, even insults from the young children and their parents do not stop their behaviour. If you have those problems, it is important to have a chat with the parents of the children you look after, you must talk to them, due to, it is not only Au pair's responsibility on the formation of the young children. I will always say that the best education comes from home, parents have the responsibility for the education of their children, they need to show them manners, human values and respect for others. Parents have to indicate them that the minder has to be respected.

2) Children understand.

Young children are growing up and they are learning to control their emotions. As babysitters, we are there to guide them to control those mad and awful emotions such as crying, shouting in public, jumping without control and so on. In my own experience, I have understood that children are like"adults", I mean, they can understand when the minder or an adult is talking to them properly and also in a calm and friendly way. If the child is crying and shouting because he/she wants to get something and you react the same way like shouting out "NO", the child won't stop making its request. We need to educate them to ask their demands in a polite way. Remind them the magic words. "Please" and "Thank you" help a lot of in those situations.

3) Do not take anything personal.

Insults, bad words, bad children's mood and so on, are the worst and complicating time for Au pair's work, however, if the babysitter stays paying attention to that behaviour, kids will be still being in the same temper. Also, most of the girls take this behaviour so personal that they start hating their job instead of enjoying it. For example, I have been in some situations where the infant says something like "you are stupid" or "I do not like you". The best thing to do is just ignore this kind of comments, DO NOT take them personally. If you respond this kind of comments, children will keep saying that at you. Remember that children (some of them) want to take control and power on you, however, you must be the authority on them.

4) Organize your time, make a routine.

"Organize your time" or "make a plan", it makes the life easy for you and also for the child, I have learned this when I used to be an Au pair in Dublin, Ireland. Make a plan for the activities you are going to do with the children, having a plan is essential, it's not just for the infants, it's also for you. The young children are always desperate, excited to know what it's next, what they are going to do after doing something. If you decided to bring them for a walk in the park, you must think ahead what it would be next, otherwise, the children will be crying because they want to stay more time in the park. One thing I used to do before bringing my little three years old to do something excited, it was to tell him the plan of the day. -"Ok, Alex, the plan for today is: going to the park and if you are a good boy, we can go to the shop to buy a treat"-. I have discovered that the child is going to behave because of he is going to get or doing something fun afterward. Believe me, it works.

5) Look after yourself.

Once, girls get the job as Au pair, they realise that it is not easy and simple to look after the young children. Babysitters also deserve a little bit time of freedom. When you take time off, it's simple to come back and do your job again with fresh ideas and more enthusiasm. What hobbies do you like? Reading, walking, jogging. Try to do something productive and fun by yourself. Remember look after yourself as the same way you look after the children you mind.

6) Don't forget your dreams and projects.

You can not be Au pair forever, it's important do not get involved in the routine. Once you get this job as a minder, you get involved in the routine and you forget about your dreams and projects. Perhaps, you got this job as a minder because you want to learn a new language, travel, explore more, or discover new opportunities, etc. You must think of the next level, once you get the goal you were looking for, it is important to ask yourself What is it next? What do I want to do? Remember that the world is open to new opportunities for you. You must have ambitious in your personal and professional life.